Oh wow I didn’t even realise Olivia Colman and Penfold from Dangermouse were single. But here they are. Sorry, kidding. Hugh is 55, a teacher and musician, and has a part-time job opening ...

This has been what you might call A Week, hasn’t it? Let’s not even go into it, let’s padlock it in the shed, wipe off the workings-out on the whiteboard, Febreze the f•ck out of ...

Years ago, before social media became all jackboots and your nan’s nan posting AI cartoons of kittens asking for money to be be allowed into Cat Heaven, this blog was scarily popular with more readers ...

Is it better to have a terrible time when the sun is shining, or in the driving rain? Does the contrast of hot weather/everything is awful offer a sliver of cheer, or make you resentful that you could ...

What happened on the date Shockingly, the “table manners” question was NOT asked. It’s a cover-up! Imagine how bad the answer must’ve been for them to leave it out. Or the journo forgot. The date was ...

Oh, the state of everything. Sometimes, as a writer, I am aware of a perceived responsibility to comment on everything all the time, but like everyone else – except columnists getting paid £££ to open ...

I kept a journal for a few years, until last summer, when I got sick of the sound of my own voice (or sight of my own handwriting). At the beginning of the year, I started again, but on the Journal ...

Know how I’ve clocked that I have entered my Hyacinth Bucket ‘era’? First thing I did when I saw that knitwear pairing was shift my eyes straight down to their shoes. What footwear would you wear for ...

Funny old thing, love. We spend our lives looking for it, or avoiding it, or claiming to be incapable of it. It frightens us; it fascinates; it can result in fucking, or crying, or hating, or yearning ...

Ah, February. Valentines. Pancakes. Rain tipping down on a permanent basis. What’s not to love? February is the kind of month you want to strangle just to get it out of the way – no wonder it’s so ...

2025: where every day is like Sunday. A Sunday in Hell, while old episodes of RI:SE play in the background. Today we are going for a v quick spin round the latest GBD, between Henry, a 28-year-old ...

We’re back! Let’s not make a big thing of it. This week drinking from the poisoned chalice of dating doom that is the Guardian Blind date are: Will, 33, a government officer (left, sans cheveux), and ...